Monday, 27 May 2013

Self-Respect (Continued Part 3)


Last week I suggested that values and integrity were the key to self-esteem. So what are values? Values are deeply held beliefs that guide us in what is right and wrong.
Values are subjective, because every single human being views life through their own subjective point of view. Every person’s point of view is unique and therefore every person’s set of values is unique. Our values act as our compass in our lives.
We are made up of our personal values. Our personal values are a combination of values ingrained in us from an early age as well as ones we have adopted ourselves over the years.
What makes values important? Because they are a set of rules we have for leading our lives, they let you know what is important to you and help you prioritise. Values help you gain clarity and focus in your life. Values help you make decisions- which leads us to integrity.
What Is Integrity and Where Does It Fit In? According to the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary, integrity is a firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values.
In order to be a person of integrity we have to live up to the values we hold to be important. Again notice how subjective this all is—the values we hold to be important.
With integrity, it doesn’t matter what your values are. It matters whether or not you live up to them. Integrity is the integration between your values and your actions.
So How Are Values and Integrity Connected to Self Esteem? Society may expect certain things from us, yet we are the ones who choose whether or not we internalize external social values and make them our own.
One of the things that I have learned over the years is that it is okay for other people to have different points of view, and if I truly believe something is right, in general or right for me, it does not matter what others think. I have begun to trust my own value system and not rely only on what others think.
Each of us has many values. Not all of our values are as important to us at the same time. Things also shift over time.
If you are enjoying this series, then I invite you to join me next week.

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