The
definition:
"The
ability to work hard and respond resiliently to failure and adversity; the
inner quality that enables individuals to work hard and stick to their
long-term passions and goals."
The word:
The
definition of grit almost perfectly describes qualities every successful
person possesses, because mental toughness builds the foundations for success.
For example,
successful people are great at delaying gratification. Successful people are
great at overcoming fear in order to do what they need to do. (Of course, that
doesn't mean they don't get scared.) Successful people don't just prioritise, they
consistently keep doing what they have decided is most important.
All those
qualities require mental strength and toughness - so it's no coincidence those
are some of the qualities of remarkably successful people.
Here are ways
you can become mentally stronger - and as a result more successful:
1. Always act
as if you are in total control.
There's a
quote often credited to Ignatius: "Pray as if God will take care of all;
act as if all is up to you."
The same
premise applies to luck. Many people feel luck has a lot to do with success or
failure. If they succeed, luck favoured them, and if they fail, luck was
against them.
Most
successful people do feel good luck played some role in their success. But they
don't wait for good luck or worry about bad luck. They act as if success or
failure is totally within their control. If they succeed, they caused
it. If they fail, they caused it.
By not
wasting mental energy worrying about what might happen to you, you can
put all your effort into making things happen. You can't control luck, but you
can definitely control you.
2. Put aside
things you have no ability to impact.
Mental strength
is like muscle strength - no one has an unlimited supply. So why waste your
power on things you can't control?
For some
people, it's politics. For others, it's family. For others, it's global
warming. Whatever it is, you care, and you want others to care. Fine. Do
what you can do: Vote. Lend a listening ear. Recycle, and reduce your
carbon footprint.
Do what you
can do. Be your own change - but don't try to make everyone else change. (They
won't.)
3. See the
past as valuable training and nothing more.
The past is
valuable. Learn from your mistakes. Learn from the mistakes of others.
Then let it
go.
Easier said
than done? It depends on your perspective. When something bad happens to you,
see it as an opportunity to learn something you didn't know. When another
person makes a mistake, don't just learn from it - see it as an opportunity to
be kind, forgiving, and understanding.
The past is
just training; it doesn't define you. Think about what went wrong but only in
terms of how you will make sure that next time, you and the people around you
will know how to make sure it goes right.
4. Celebrate
the success of others.
Many people -
I know a few like this - see success as a zero-sum game: There's only so much
to go around. If someone else succeeds, they think that diminishes their chance
of success.
Resentment
sucks up a massive amount of mental energy - energy better applied elsewhere. When
a friend does something awesome, that doesn't preclude you from doing something
awesome. In fact, where success is concerned, birds of a feather tend to flock
together - so draw your successful friends even closer.
Don't resent
awesomeness. Create and celebrate awesomeness, wherever you find it, and in
time you'll find even more of it in yourself.
5. Never
allow yourself to whine. (Or complain.)
Your words
have power, especially over you. Whining about your problems makes you feel
worse, not better.
So if
something is wrong, don't waste time complaining. Put that mental energy into
making the situation better. (Facing facts, unless you want to whine about it
forever, eventually you'll have to make it better.)
So why waste
time? Fix it now. Don't talk about what's wrong. Talk about how you'll make
things better, even if that conversation is just with yourself.
And do the
same with your friends or colleagues. Don't just serve as a shoulder they can
cry on. Friends don't let friends whine; friends help friends make their lives
better.
6. Focus only
on impressing yourself.
No one likes
you for your clothes, your car, your possessions, your title, or your
accomplishments. Those are all things. People may like your things - but that
doesn't mean they like you.
Genuine
relationships make you happier, and you'll only form genuine relationships when
you stop trying to impress and start trying to just be yourself. And you'll
have a lot more mental energy to spend on the people who really do matter in
your life.
7. Count your
blessings.
Take a moment
every night before you turn out the light to take a deep breath and in that
moment, quit worrying about what you don't have. Quit worrying about
what others have that you don't.
Think about
what you do have. You have a lot to be thankful for. Feeling better
about yourself is the best way of all to recharge your mental batteries.
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