How To Stop The Confidence Busters

Are you self-critical? If so, you are not alone. Many criticise their own performance - and this is another confidence buster.

If you're self-critical of your performance and dwell on shortcomings, how will you grow your confidence?

We know perfectionists, for example, tend to be very self-critical and scold themselves for mistakes. How many times have you said: "If only I hadn't missed that  _ _ _ _ _ _ !"

People who are committed to improvement, especially perfectionists, sabotage their confidence by being overly harsh about their performance. When assessing their own performance, they:

• Focus on the mistakes and missed opportunities
• Are self-critical of their performance
• Can't remember the good elements
• Disqualify any positives about their performance
• Can't feel satisfied even when they do well because they never perform up to their high expectations
• Want to perform perfectly and view less than perfect as a failure

What can do to avoid this confidence buster? After all, you want to earn confidence not tear it down.

Here are a few mental game strategies to consider:

(1) First, try to be objective about your performance (instead of subjective). When you are subjective, the emotions take over, such as frustration and anger, and that's when you can be the most self-critical.

(2) Be your own best coach. How would you look at your performance if you pretended to be the most positive coach you know? What are two positive things a coach might tell you about your performance that would make you feel satisfied or more confident?

(3) Focus on your assets instead of mistakes. Ask yourself: What are two things you did well today? 

(4) Focus on improvement, not shortcomings. Instead of thinking about all the reasons you failed or messed up, think about what you want to improve next week. Feel confident knowing you have worked to improve areas that will help you perform better the next time.

Do not derail your confidence with self-criticism and self-reproach.

To Your Success

David

Automation Increases The Personal Touch

‘Automation’ it sounds so cold and impersonal. But could it be used to help you be more personal?

Here’s what I mean.

We run a lot of events and at one a friend was tasked with registrations. If you’ve ever dealt with event registrations, you know it generates a lot of emails. One of the options in his marketing software was to send an email to anyone who started to register for the event, but stopped for some reason and still hadn’t registered within an hour. He chose to send a simple email along the lines of, “If you have any questions or are having trouble registering, just reply and I’ll help you out.” He actually wasn’t sure he should, afraid it would be “too pushy.” But there was no way for him to watch every single person attempt to register and send an email if they needed help without automation.

The first email he got back was a potential attendee worried the event would sell out before he could get the approvals he needed to make the purchase. So my friend held a ticket for him.

So automation can help you be more personal, but only if you are smart and selective about the automation you set up.

Take a look at your own marketing processes. Where can you set up some simple automation that will help you to be personal in ways you otherwise couldn’t be?

Your Friday Lesson From Richard Branson

Don't Do It If You Don't Enjoy It 

Running a business takes a lot of blood, sweat, and tears (and caffeine). But at the end of the day you should be building something you will be proud of.

Richard Branson says, "When I started Virgin from a basement in west London, there was no great plan or strategy. I didn't set out to build a business empire ... For me, building a business is all about doing something to be proud of, bringing talented people together and creating something that's going to make a real difference to other people's lives."

Nine Ways to be Happier in Thirty Minutes

"Being happier doesn't have to be a long-term ambition. You can start right now. In the 
next 30 minutes, tackle as many of the following suggestions as possible. Not only 
will these tasks themselves increase your happiness, but the mere fact that you've 
achieved some concrete goals will boost your mood.

1. Raise your activity level to pump up your energy. If you're on the phone, stand up
and pace. Take the stairs instead of the elevator. Put more energy into your voice.
Take a brisk 10-minute walk. Even better...

2. Take a walk outside. Research suggests that light stimulates brain chemicals that
improve mood. For an extra boost, get your sunlight first thing in the morning.

3. Reach out. Send an e-mail to a friend you haven't seen in a while, or reach out to
someone new. Having close bonds with other people is one of the most important keys
to happiness. When you act in a friendly way, not only will others feel more friendly
toward you, but you'll also strengthen your feelings of friendliness for other people.

4. Rid yourself of a nagging task. Deal with that insurance problem, purchase
something you need, or make that long-postponed appointment with the dentist.
Crossing an irksome chore off your to-do list will give you a rush of elation.

5. Create a more serene environment. Outer order contributes to inner peace, so
spend some time organizing bills and tackling the piles in the kitchen. A large stack
of little tasks can feel overwhelming, but often just a few minutes of work can make
a sizable dent. Set the timer for 10 minutes and see what you can do.

6. Do a good deed. Introduce two people by e-mail, take a minute to pass along
useful information, or deliver some gratifying praise. In fact, you can also...

7. Save someone's life. Sign up to be an organ donor, and remember to tell your
family about your decision. Do good, feel good―it really works!

8. Act happy. Fake it 'til you feel it. Research shows that even an artificially
induced smile boosts your mood. And if you're smiling, other people will perceive
you as being friendlier and more approachable.

9. Learn something new. Think of a subject that you wish you knew more about and
spend 15 minutes on the Internet reading about it, or go to a bookstore and buy a
book about it. But be honest! Pick a topic that really interests you, not something you
think you "should" or "need to" learn about.

Some people worry that wanting to be happier is a selfish goal, but in fact, research
shows that happier people are more sociable, likable, healthy, and productive
―and they're more inclined to help other people. By working to boost your own
happiness, you're making other people happier, too."

By Gretchen Rubin, author of 'The Happiness Project'
www.gretchenrubin.com

Are You Making Your Employees Stupid?

The Price of Training

According to Merrill Lynch, “50% of employee skills become outdated in 3 to 5 years.” When I read this statistic, it really surprised me. Many leaders think that the experience of just doing the required work, day in and day out, is enough to keep their employees knowledgeable to optimally perform their duties. Unfortunately that is not true at all.

On the job training, meaning training that is acquired by just doing your job, interacting with clients, and talking with colleagues is hardly enough to create productive and engaged employees that are on the cutting edge of their disciplines. Many leaders and managers struggle with training programs because they are often tasked with reducing costs. So training programs are often the first to go.

Consider this though, according to a Saratoga Institute study, “Workers who have good training and professional development paths average 12% turnover; workers who don’t have learning and growth opportunities average 41% turnover.” That is not even the worst of it; consider additionally that the average cost of replacing an employee is 150% of their salary.

Those numbers mean that eliminating a training budget will probably cost you much more than you can save. To support that statement, Motorola has discovered that, “…for every $1 spent on training, there will be $30 in productivity gains in 3 years.” Why then would anyone cut training?

There is a lot of hidden meaning in these numbers that whisper of leadership, culture, productivity, cost savings, and innovation; but they all point to the fact that an organization will be less successful if they operate without formal training and coaching opportunities for their employees.

I challenge you to put together a training program for this year, for your employees that will make them, and you, more successful in building the organisation. Don’t make your employees “stupid” by failing to give them proper training.

Shameless plug, but if you are interested in the next steps then please contact me.

Do you agree with these statistics about training programs? Please share your experience with training and development programs that you have experienced or implemented.

Rules Of Personal Success

The Six Rules of Personal Success

Of all human abilities, one stands out, the ability to see the Big Picture, the things that are important in life, and not to be distracted by small, trivial, and irrelevant things; the intelligence to separate the message from the background noise. ‘The Big Picture’ is about the grand goals; the big dreams and aspirations people treasure in every stage and aspect of life. But how can you grasp and hold on to the Big Picture? What does it take?

1. Get Your Priorities Right

Setting priorities right is about making intelligent choices, deciding what goals to pursue in which order, which takes vision and foresight. Intelligent people rise over the hills and valleys of the present to gaze over the hills and the valleys of the future and see the invisible and the challenges it holds. Renowned entrepreneurs like Bill Gates, Steve Jobs and Mark Zuckerberg had such vision and foresight; they could see how technology could change the lives of everyday people; and came up with products and services that will turn their vision into reality.

2. Use Your Resources Wisely

Using resources wisely is also about making intelligent choices. It is about deriving the most value out of limited resources; shopping around for the right merchandise by asking three simple questions:

1. ·      Do I need this piece of merchandise?
2. ·      Is the price right?
3. ·      Is this merchandise the best use of my money?

In some cases, using resources wisely means more than shopping around for bargains for the right merchandise. It also means paying the least interest and finance charges for the things you buy on credit.

3. Stay Focused

Staying focused means sticking with your priorities and goals; focusing on the message, not on the background noise; and executing. Take the right steps to reach your goals. That’s all that matters in the end.

It takes patience, persistence, and discipline to stay focused. Patience to overcome the hurdles that stand between you and your goal; persistence to overcome the failures, setbacks, and temptations that may take you off course; and discipline to play the game right, to comply with all the rules: know what you are doing, be punctual, and work out all the details.

4. Develop the Right Relations

Reaching a certain goal requires moral and psychological stamina.  It takes skills and resources no single individual possesses. This means that in pursuing personal success, people need friends and partners to overcome the many obstacles that stand between them and their personal goals.

5. Don’t be Greedy

Greed is the idolisation and relentless pursuit of something that lets people distinguish and set themselves apart from others—money, power, status, and so on; the feeling that they never have enough of it, and nothing can stop them from amassing and accumulating it.

Greed is an obsession that—like alcohol—numbs people’s senses, blurs their vision, and makes them lose sight of the Big Picture. Greed leads people to live a life of imbalance and disproportion, a life of reckless and dangerous behaviour. People who want everything in life fail to negotiate with others and compromise, and end up losing everything. People, who want everything from personal friendships and partnerships and become selfish and arrogant, end up destroying them.

6. Don’t be Complacent

Complacency is the opposite of greed. It’s the idolisation of things people have accomplished, the feeling that they have reached the telos (ultimate destination).

This may sound contradictory to what was argued earlier about staying focused, but success isn’t an entitlement. It cannot be taken for granted. Successful people cannot afford to be complacent because good times do not last forever, especially in a rapidly changing world. That’s why complacency is dangerous. People who are complacent with their accomplishments fail to catch up with the rest of the world and are left behind

Your Friday Lesson From Richard Branson

Cut Ties Without Burning Bridges

Business ventures with another person, be it a friend or a partner, don’t always work out. If this is the case, successful entrepreneurs know when to part ways.

But just because you decide to go in another direction doesn’t mean things have to end badly, especially with a friend, says Richard Branson. Handle any problems quickly and head-on, and end the relationship as amicably as possible.

Nice Companies Finish First

Author and social media guru Peter Shankman has over 300,000 twitter followers! I have just read his book Nice Companies Finish First - Why Cutthroat Management is Over and Collaboration is in. You have got to love the title!

I like to think of myself as a nice person and would like niceness to be one of my company's values. In reality, I have known some real jerks who are highly successful in business so it is reassuring that this is not the only type that can win.

The main thesis is - the power of the press now lies with with customer.   Social media like Twitter, Facebook and blogs allow the consumer to influence many more people than they previously could.  Any degree of jerkness or niceness is now amplified by the crowd. 

Being a "nice" company is now the lowest cost way to market.

Peter believes in being authentic. He also applies the niceness principle to life in general - not just business. In short - it is less stressful to be nice and you get the same or better results so you may as well be nice.

And a quote used in the book:
"The most powerful leaders are almost always the role models for the change they seek." 

Are You Easily Distracted?

Do This To Defeat Distractions


Research shows that digital distractions fry your mind’s ability to stay on task. But with a little practice, you can train your brain to block out interruptions and remain focused, finds a study from the University of California, Santa Barbara (UCSB).

After just 2 weeks of what the researchers call “mindfulness training,” better focus helped people improve their scores on the reading comprehension portion of the GRE exam by an average of 16 percentile points. The training also improved working memory, or your mind’s ability to retain and sort through small pieces of information, the research shows.

Your brain contains several regions that scientists collectively call the “default network,” which kicks into high gear when your mind wanders, explains study coauthor Michael Mrazek, who studies attention and focus at UCSB. By training your brain to focus on simple sensory cues, it may be possible to decrease activity in the default network, which could help your mind stick to a single task, Mrazek explains.

One of the most important steps of mindfulness training is ditching distractions, Mrazek says. Whether you’re on the train home from work, at your desk, or having dinner, begin by setting aside anything you may be reading, watching, or listening to, he advises.

Next, sit upright and try to focus only on simple sensory perceptions, like your breathing, the sound of rain, or the way your food tastes. It’s all right if things pop into your head, but try not to think about them too directly, Mrazek recommends. Counting your breaths up to 10 and then starting over at zero can help to keep your thoughts unmuddled. Do this for 5 to 10 minutes a day, and you’ll improve your mind’s ability to stay focused, he says.

Try it for yourself.

Quote of the Day

“"We are grateful to The Washington Post, The New York Times, Time Magazine and other great publications whose directors have attended our meetings and respected their promises of discretion for almost forty years.

It would have been impossible for us to develop our plan for the world if we had been subject to the bright lights of publicity during those years. But, the work is now much more sophisticated and prepared to march towards a world government.

The supranational sovereignty of an intellectual elite and world bankers is surely preferable to the national autodetermination practiced in past centuries." 
― David Rockefeller [June, 1991]


"We are on the verge of a global transformation. All we need is the right major crisis, and the nations will accept the New World Order."

― David Rockefeller speaking at the United Nations Ambassadors' dinner. [Sept. 23, 1994]

NINJA Generation

Did you ever watch the film 'Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps'?



In this movie, Gordon Gekko ―played by Michael Douglas― tells the students
of Fordham University that the banks have bet trillions of dollars on derivatives,
and that greed has destroyed the foundations of the world's financial institutions.

He warns them that they are part of the 'N.I.N.J.A' generation:

No Income, No Jobs, No Assets.

Your Friday Lesson From Richard Branson

When it Comes to Making Mistakes, 

Bounce Back, Don’t Fall Down.

Your decision will not always be the best decision. Everyone makes mistakes, but the best thing you can do in the face of a mistake is own up to it.

Honesty isn’t just the best policy, it’s the only policy, notes Richard Branson. When a mistake is made, don’t let it consume you. Uncover the problem and get to work fixing it.

Quest for Perfection

England's Most Broken Man

Having just finished Jonny Wilkinson's autobiography (Jonny: My Autobiography) I now know that his endless hours on the training field, going as far back as pre-school sessions when he cycled to Farnham RFC with a snack and a rucksack of rugby balls, stem from an obsessive quest for perfection. A quest for perfection so consuming that it borders on illness.

His childhood memories tell a story: harmless errors, from misspelling 'gauge' to forgetting to mention his father in a radio interview would evoke stress, tears and panic. Even up to weeks afterwards.

Throughout his career his pursuit of excellence went to extraordinary extremes. Yet paradoxically, the more he strove to be the world's greatest player the more unhappy he became. Because the greater public and media attention made him shrink from everyday life. Ultimately, his obsessive streak threatened not only his career - playing through knocks leading to later and more serious injuries - but even his own sanity.

It is a remarkable book and a startling insight into the mindset that developed in his quest for perfection.